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Post by Legion on Sept 23, 2014 18:37:14 GMT -5
Chris recently got us speculating about doom metal, and I was wondering what my rule of thumb was to classify something as doom metal. So here's the idea: give your own definition of types of metal/rock/whatever, as your own sensitivity perceives them. Go stream of consciousness. There's art to be made here. Example: Doom Metal: if it feels like a colossal beast plodding along, it's doom metal
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chrisvosje
Lawn Killing Metal God
He was soon borne away by the waves and lost in darkness and distance.
Posts - 586
Likes - 12
Joined - January 1970
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Post by chrisvosje on Sept 23, 2014 19:21:15 GMT -5
I like the idea. But it's harder than I thought.
Folk Metal: if you imagine midgets forging steel, while drinking larger than life kegs of beer, it's folk metal.
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Post by Legion on Sept 23, 2014 19:33:58 GMT -5
Hah, cool.
Also all little people reading this now hate you.
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chrisvosje
Lawn Killing Metal God
He was soon borne away by the waves and lost in darkness and distance.
Posts - 586
Likes - 12
Joined - January 1970
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Post by chrisvosje on Sept 23, 2014 20:11:44 GMT -5
For the record: I'm about as tall as a thumbnail myself. And folk metal isn't known for its political correctness anyway. I was referring to the guys in the lower left corner: I'm sure everyone is familiar with Suske & Wiske (most probably under a different name, but they're Belgian-Flemish, and those are the names I know), and I really love how the author played around with the Nibelungen myth. on-topic: Industrial Metal: if it feels like you've ended up in a combination of the final scenes of Cobra and Terminator 2, and you're the one being chased, it's probably industrial metal.
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Post by Legion on Sept 23, 2014 20:24:11 GMT -5
I knew that you meant dwarves, but it was too fitting an occasion not to chime in. Bless you dude.
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Post by regina on Sept 24, 2014 6:32:09 GMT -5
Funny stuff - but like Chris said, not so easy to put into words. I'll give it a try then (all to be taken with a little wink ;-)): THRASH METAL ~ when after putting on the headphones and cranking the volume to the max, you feel like you've been run over by a fully laden truck speeding on the motorway. GLAM METAL ~ when the band looks like they've been raiding their sisters' wardrobes and make-up kits after trying in vain to fix a bad-hair day at the local hairdressers. PROG ROCK ~ when musicians try hard to outdo one another after successfully completing years and years of intense study at the conservatory. BLACK METAL ~ when you're hopeless at deciphering the band's name on the cover. Attachments:
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Post by lardomatic on Sept 24, 2014 7:42:19 GMT -5
Sports Metal (aka nu metal): A bunch of lary twats just off their paper round, bouncing round in track suits and trainers like wannabe 'ganstaz'. They often deliberately mis-spell words to sound 'cool' and down with the kids, eg Bizkit (biscuit) or the aforementioned nu (new)
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Post by Legion on Sept 24, 2014 9:21:30 GMT -5
Lardomatic doesn't like nu metal
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motorajzd
Lawn is Bedridden
Posts - 119
Likes - 28
Joined - January 1970
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Post by motorajzd on Sept 24, 2014 12:18:10 GMT -5
I hate classifications and genres. Also, i think the only true classification is led by feeling. Example: i think first two sodom and destruction records are way more black metal than any of 2nd wave bands like mayhem, darkthrone, satyricon etc.... Also, i think those records are way more r'n'r than lot of others that get such classification, because they have attitude and you can feel they are done by heart Btw, Darkthrone logo ain't hard to read!!! They have some great records. Waiting for "underground resistance" to appear in mailbox these days......
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Post by lardomatic on Sept 25, 2014 17:46:21 GMT -5
Lardomatic doesn't like nu metal Whatever gave you that impression?
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Post by Legion on Sept 25, 2014 18:51:52 GMT -5
I can read minds. Secret ancient technique.
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borntobooze
Lawn is Dead
MHB 3750
Posts - 256
Likes - 47
Joined - January 1970
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Post by borntobooze on Sept 25, 2014 20:39:16 GMT -5
Death Metal - Terrifying and repulsive creatures coming from a completely hostile world, spreading gross rhythms and violent words. You never know the name of these creatures until you look in the booklet of the album. Ok.. I try, I try...
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chrisvosje
Lawn Killing Metal God
He was soon borne away by the waves and lost in darkness and distance.
Posts - 586
Likes - 12
Joined - January 1970
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Post by chrisvosje on Sept 26, 2014 18:14:49 GMT -5
I can read minds. Secret ancient technique. Christian metal: God can read minds. Secret ancient technique. But he uses it for good. Or for God. Same difference. You should like us anyway. And give us your daughters.
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pedrogunner
Lawn is Bedridden
If that's all there is, it ain't so bad... rock and roll!
Posts - 166
Likes - 62
Joined - January 1970
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Post by pedrogunner on Sept 29, 2014 9:58:34 GMT -5
BLACK METAL ~ when you're hopeless at deciphering the band's name on the cover.
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timtelford
Lawn Killing Metal God
MHB3718
Posts - 712
Likes - 85
Joined - January 1970
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Post by timtelford on Sept 29, 2014 14:36:31 GMT -5
metal is metal, nu metal is terrible...until you see them live and it rocks like fuck! I've never heard Municipal Waste but every time I see the logo it makes me think of wher e I take our rubbish. I have to concede Glam metal is terrible, and then have pangs of guilt cos I have so many mid and late 80s glam records?! Life is about dilemmas
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